Teaching students how to understand and avoid abusive relationships, part II

PROGRAM CONTENT
Session 1: Introduction

The session begins by identifying several purposes for the group: to help girls predict dangerous dating situations, to teach them strategies to avoid these events, and to promote the development of healthy, safe relationships. The boundaries and expectations of a psychoeducational model are discussed, reinforcing the goal of acquiring skills rather than participating in therapy. This generally leads to the development of group rules that should include confidentiality and respect for others’ opinions and the right to speak without interruption. Once the purpose and format of the group have been discussed, definitions of abuse can be solicited through a brainstorming activity. Responses are then written on the blackboard and grouped into five categories of abuse (verbal, emotional, mental, sexual, and physical). For homework, the girls are asked to bring to the next group examples of male and female stereotypes from the media, for example, from movies, television, print ads, commercials, and popular songs.

Session 2: Popular Culture–The Context for Abuse

The second session begins by reviewing examples from the homework assignment. Using the method outlined in Preventing Teen Dating Violence: A Three Session Curriculum for Teaching Adolescents (Sousa, Bancroft, & German, 1987), girls are asked to respond to the descriptors “masculine” and “feminine.” Characteristics such as muscular, powerful, and tall are likely to be ascribed to a man, whereas a woman is usually seen as pretty, quiet, and thin. The definition of stereotype is then introduced and the notion of stereotypes as limiting or “boxing one in” is presented. Participants are then encouraged to explore what happens when someone attempts to step out of the box or acts in a way that contradicts cultural expectations. For example, a soft-spoken boy who enjoys cooking may be subjected to ridicule and his sexual orientation questioned. The hypothesis can be developed that women are urged to be passive and acquiescent in dating relationships, a pattern that can place them at risk for abuse. For homework, the girls are asked to observe and record incidents of interpersonal abuse, as defined in Session 1, throughout the next week.

Session 3: Warning Signs and Risk Factors

This session focuses on the precipitants of dating violence and begins by asking the group to brainstorm for warning signs, including jealousy and possessiveness, poor control of temper, demeaning attitudes toward women, alcohol and drug use, and attempts to control personal freedom (e.g., choice of clothing and friends). The influence of a family history of violence, relating to both victim and aggressor, is usually raised and can be identified as a risk factor. Participants are asked to respond to a true or false exercise concerning popular misconceptions about teen dating violence, for example, alcohol causes a man to be abusive, or victims bring on the abuse themselves (Sousa et al., 1987). At this point in the group, leaders may solicit personal examples that help to illustrate theoretical principles. For homework, the girls are asked to respond to a questionnaire designed to identify risk factors in their current dating relationships.

Session 4: Date Rape–A Definition

In the fourth session, participants are shown a videotape designed for high school students on the topic of date rape (Sunburst Communications, 1990). The tape is stopped at various points for questions and discussion. Typical concerns include the victim’s responsibility in causing the attack, the occurrence of date rape in long-term relationships, and the difference between the popularly held and legal definitions of rape. For homework, the participants are asked to review a handout detailing local and national date rape statistics.

Session 5: Date Rape Prevention

The fifth session begins with a discussion of the homework and the videotape viewed in the previous session. An activity called “The Safety Game” is then introduced. Leaders read several dating scenarios, and participants are instructed to stop the story at crucial moments when decisions around safety can be made. They then generate several options, evaluating the possible outcomes of each. This represents an opportunity to use examples from current events in which date rape was alleged, for example, Mike Tyson and William Kennedy Smith. Practical strategies for prevention are discussed, including having an alternate way home, carrying money for a phone call or a cab, and avoiding drugs and alcohol. Emphasis is placed on identifying personal expectations and communicating them clearly to dating partners. The girls are asked to outline expectations for their current or future dating relationships as a homework assignment. For example, they should decide in advance how much physical intimacy they want.

Session 6: Conflict Management

This session begins by brainstorming the characteristics (healthy vs. unhealthy) of arguments and displaying them on a blackboard. These are expanded on in a handout listing typical factors that sabotage effective dialogue. The girls frequently cite name-calling and blaming as common obstacles. Participants are then asked to listen to an audiotape of couples arguing and to identify roadblocks to communication (Bunnell & Bunnell, 1990. The coleaders then solicit suggestions for more positive interactions. Asked to observe their behavior during the week, girls are told to bring examples of both positive and negative communication to the next group as a homework assignment.

Session 7: Building Communication Skills

This session starts by reviewing the homework. Girls typically share examples of negative communication and express frustration around changing rigid patterns of interaction. Group members are then introduced to the principles of active listening, followed by the use of “I” messages (Gordon, 1970) in establishing assertive behavior. Examples of real-life conflicts are then solicited from participants, and they are encouraged to role-play new skills. Girls are asked to give an “I” message at least once during the week as a homework assignment.

Session 8: Going on–Personal and Community Resources

This session offers girls an opportunity to provide feedback for the group leaders, evaluating positive and negative aspects of each session. Suggestions for future groups can then be explored. A handout describing the Abuse Prevention Act of 1978 and its practical application (for example, restraining orders) is distributed. The value of networking and peer support is emphasized to the girls as a means of advocating for themselves and others.

EVALUATION STRATEGIES
Although no outcome studies have been completed to date on the Dating Safely group treatment model, plans are underway to conduct a pre- and posttreatment assessment of information and attitudes regarding dating violence. On intake into the group, girls will be administered a brief questionnaire (see Appendix). This same questionnaire will be re-administered at the end of the group. It is expected that girls who participate in the full 8-week course will demonstrate improved scores, indicating a greater understanding of abuse in relationships and strategies for self-awareness and protection. Retention of information over time may be examined by giving the same questionnaire 6 and 12 months after termination of the group.

A more difficult dimension to study is the change in behavior among group participants. Although items regarding dating habits and involvement in abusive relationships are included in the questionnaire, girls may be reluctant to admit to unsafe practices, thus creating a falsely positive outcome. Guaranteeing anonymity or adding a personal interview component to evaluation procedures may be helpful in obtaining reliable reports.

CONCLUSION
The topic of dating violence can raise anxiety in those who have experienced such trauma, either first-hand or as a witness. Because of this potential, it seems advisable to address the subject within the safe structure of a psychoeducational model. Providing students with an outline of topics, handouts of didactic material, and homework assignments reassures them that there are limits to the group and that they need not recall their private pain to participate. In fact, if students are allowed to relax their boundaries and reveal highly personal material in a school-based group, they may find it difficult to compose themselves before returning to class. Moreover, in some cases, agitated students may later act out their feelings inappropriately. Those who become overwhelmed, even within the framework of the group, can be referred for therapy outside of school.

Although this group model seems to be successful in raising awareness of dating violence among young women, it deals with only half of the problem. According to the U.S. Bureau of Justice (as reported in Sousa et al., 1987), 95% of reported dating assaults are committed by men. Many young men need to be taught nonviolent methods of handling anger, as well as how to behave respectfully within a relationship. It seems as if current popular concepts of manhood, locked in media stereotypes, leave little room for the notion of compromise and shared power. At an early age, perhaps as first graders, boys can be exposed to an ideal of manhood that encourages them to develop empathy.

The Dating Safely model has been replicated in settings throughout the Quincy Public School System. The psychoeducational format is easy to follow, even for inexperienced practitioners and is a safe, contained vehicle for addressing a potentially explosive topic.